why I changed my mind about being a polyglot
I originally wanted to name this post “why I don’t want to be a polyglot anymore”, but it sounded a little too clickbaity, plus it’s not like I’m going to go from (kind of?) being a polyglot to not being one anymore. But my aspirations when it comes to language learning have definitely changed in the last couple of years, so let’s try to unpack that.
First of all I should say that I actually don’t think I ever wanted to be a polyglot, at least not consciously. It’s always been more of an impulse control issue. A song I can’t stop listening to, hearing a native speaker talk, even just the idea of me speaking the language used to be enough for me to start downloading apps and browsing for textbooks. The way a hoarder likes getting new things, but doesn’t necessarily care to get labeled as a hoarder, I was having a hard time stopping myself from starting new languages without dreaming about becoming a polyglot. It’s almost like I was so caught up in the here and now, that I wasn’t looking at the bigger picture.
Because if I did look at the bigger picture, I would probably realize that I actually dislike quite a lot of aspects of being a polyglot.
Reason 1. I’m actually not that good at maintaining multiple languages at the same time. Once I get into a language, I kind of let it consume me. It becomes all I want to do and I usually find it really hard to make myself care about my other languages. Plus, the more I learn, the more I realize how much more there is to learn (which gets me very excited and eager to dedicate even more time to the language—always at the expense of my other languages).
This fixation (if allowed to) can sometimes last for years. More often than not though, I start feeling guilty about neglecting other languages and force myself out of whatever momentum I’ve been able to gain in order to focus on one of them.
I think the question of how to maintain multiple languages is deeply personal, by the way. There are people who find creative ways to use a dozen of languages every week or month and then there are people who are totally fine with focusing on one language for a couple of years and then completely abandoning it to study other languages. I am not either of those. I will focus on one or two languages at the expense of the others and as a bonus feel bad about it the whole time 🤡.
Reason 2. Most things I’m interested in doing in a language require at least a B2 level. I learn languages mostly to read and I do not enjoy speaking unless I’m at least decent at expressing myself (and by decent I mean B1-B2).
You know those people who spend a couple of weeks learning the language before a trip to be able to order at restaurants, talk to staff at the hotel, buy produce using the language, etc.? I so wish I was like that, but the reality is that I will not open my mouth (outside of the classroom) unless I’m 90% sure I will be able to say what I want and also understand the other person. Of course this is not a healthy attitude to have, and social anxiety is definitely a factor here, but I haven’t been able to change that in the last 30 years, so I’m very close to just accepting it as a fact.
Same with books. I’ll get through 5-10 graded readers and picture books if I have to (and that usually happens within a couple of months), but the books that make language learning worth it for me are the ones that intimidate me even as translations into English or Russian (two languages in which reading is the easiest for me).
I see people criticizing language learners for having “A2 in 5 languages”, but I honestly don’t think that’s a problem as long as you’re honest about it and this matches your goals for learning. In my case A2 would just never be enough for what I want to do with my languages, so it makes sense then to focus on quality and cut back on the quantity.
Reason 3. Even the idea of juggling multiple languages sounds overwhelming. Say, the moment comes when I have reached a point where I no longer need to dedicate time to studying the languages and can just use them (so, reading, listening, speaking and writing in them). That’s 7 languages (Russian, English, Spanish, Italian, Korean, German and Polish)! Way too many to be keeping up with for someone who’s trying to also have a social life, potentially switch careers, stay physically active and have hobbies that are not related to language learning.
So what’s my conclusion then? Last year I decided to basically drop 2 of my languages — Greek (which I still feel nostalgic about) and Japanese (which I’m pretty sure I won’t be going back to). Apart from those, I don’t think I will be dropping anything else anytime soon. My only beginner languages at this point are German and Polish and both are languages I’d been wanting to learn for about 10 years before actually starting them so I guess I’ll just have to ✨suffer✨ the consequences.